Post by sandymarek on Apr 9, 2014 21:17:57 GMT -4
<p>
While Jarrod goes to get Jingo saddled up Nick returns to the house and is met by Victoria handing him a lunch for Heath. Thanking her “I will make sure he is eating his lunch” Nick informs her who then asks, “Where is Jarrod going?”
“Into town,” Nick mentions, “To see if there is anything on that investigation he has going and wanted to find out if there are any cases for him.”
“How do you feel about that Nick?” Victoria inquires.
“It no longer matters to me” Nick states “As much as I wanted it done at first I want him here regardless of what it should come to say. He does need someone like me to care about him and he could use a friend; a big brother,” with a smile showing, “And you were right when you said he does need some understanding and patience. And I’ll tell you I’m going to be the best big brother, the best friend that boy could ever want or need. It just took a little longer than the rest of you to see that. But you want to know something?” Victoria asks, “What Nick?”
“Here and now, the sound of big brother” Nick replies, “Has a nice sound to it.”
Taking hold of his cheek “Well Nick” Victoria says “I knew you had it in you. I just wondered how long it was going to take before you found that out.”
“Well, I found it” Nick tells her “I no longer have any bad feelings regarding him. I just feel so bad for what he went through. I’m gonna do all I can to get him on his feet.” Victoria says “That is all I ever wanted from you Nick.”
Still smiling, “I know,” Nick states, “I could be mule-headed at times.”
“I won’t argue with you on that” Victoria says “But you were right too. Your father did leave the ranch to you and keeping us all safe. You were only doing what you thought was right. I won’t fault you for that and you do have a caring heart.”
“You knew from that very first day,” Nick mentions, “That there was something more to him.”
“I did yes,” Victoria confides, “I could see it in him as well as hear it in his voice that there was something more to him, something deeper than any of us knew. I just didn’t realize just how rough.”
“Well” Nick states “It won’t get any deeper or rougher than it has. He has me now and I won’t allow anyone to ever hurt him again. I do understand now some of what you were trying to get across to me last night and you were right. His being here is the right thing to do, he belongs here with us. Well” giving her a kiss on the cheek “I better be going. I’ll see you tonight when the kids get home from school.” Victoria then says “Good luck with what you could get out of him, Nick.”
“I’ll do my best,” Nick promises and taking hold of Heath’s lunch he heads out to the barn and retrieves his horse. Placing the lunch in Coco’s saddlebag he walks her out into the open, mounts up and heads off to the North Pasture.
<p>
Returning to the kitchen to give Silas a hand with cleaning it up “Silas” Victoria says “You knew of Heath sleeping out in the barn since that first night he came to live with us.” Silas answers, “I did, yes, Miz Barkley.”
Victoria asks, “Could I ask you how come you didn’t say anything until now?”
“It wasn’t for me to say Miz Barkley” Silas says “Sometimes it’s best to find out for yourself; if I mentioned it to you when I first knew of it, it could’ve gone worse.”
“Gone worse?” Victoria perplexed asks “How so?”
“If I said something” Silas explains “You would’ve probably have told him to sleep inside and that might’ve done more harm than good. He does what you tell him and if he’s been living a very sheltered life for so long he may have seen being told to stay in his room as a type of prison. Mr. Heath had a lot of bad things happen to him. So, telling him to stay in his room to sleep just would’ve been worse. You understand, Miz Barkley?’
Nodding her head, “I understand,” Victoria admits.
Silas mentions “Now that you’re aware maybe you’ll find a way to do it without it bothering him.”
“Could I ask,” Victoria inquires, “How is it that you knew since that first night?”
“He always came in from the outside” Silas states “Each morning he never came down the stairs only up the walk. So I figured it out rather quickly. None of you noticed or were aware because no one was really paying much attention to it. You were looking at things on the surface or what you assumed to be but not how it actually was.” Victoria replies, “I see what you mean.”
“And with Mr. Nick’s mind elsewhere,” Silas adds, “I think all of you were in some ways too. You expect him to be living differently than the way he really was.”
“I guess we do have a lot to learn” Victoria surmises “And a lot of work ahead of us to do with him.”
“Yes” Silas notes “You do. He spent many years living the life he had. It’s not something that will happen over night or miraculously. It’s going to take time, patience and understanding.”
Victoria says, “That is what I was telling Nick.”
“I know” Silas admits “I heard some of what you were telling him the other night. But it’s gonna take the entire family and I mean the entire family including me to get him to where he needs to be.”
Victoria replies, “You’re right Silas; it is!”
<p>
Arriving up at the North Pasture Nick catches sight of Bobby, Ron, Chad, Davy and Heath busily working together in erecting the fence. After taking care of Coco he greets the men as he comes over to them who in turn reply, “Hi, Mr. Barkley.”
Not hearing Heath’s voice Nick walks over to him and says, “Hello Heath,” who glances up at him and responds, “Hi Nick.”
“I didn’t hear your voice,” Nick then says, “I was worried. You okay?”
“I,” Heath replies, “Okay.” Nick says, “Well, just checking. How’s it coming?” he asks all of them with Ron answering, “Oh, it’s coming.”
Looking at how much got done thus far and how it looks “Oh Heath” Nick asks “Did you do all of this?” noticing the posts lined up across one side about 10 of them and then the wired fence attached to some of the posts with wooden slats over them going horizontally across with four slats per section.
“I believe he has Mr. Barkley,” Ron responds.
With Bobby adding, “Yeah, when we got here this was done already.”
“I knew it was late last night when I came up here so I didn’t pay much attention to it at the time but Heath, this is very nice; very good!” Nick then asks, “Where did you learn to do something like this?”
Shrugging his shoulders, “Not know,” Heath answers, “Saw it somewhere.”
“One of the ranches you worked at?” Nick asks. Heath says “Not know; maybe.”
“Well this is great, really is” Nick insists “However, let’s talk some more later I am here to give you a hand” grabbing one of the hammers from the wagon he joins them in putting up the fence “And at noontime, we will stop and have lunch together. How’s that sound Heath?”
While working “Sounds good Nick” Heath replies with Nick saying “Sounds good to me too.” Chad then cuts in “Uh, Mr. Barkley?” Nick replies, “Yes Chad?”
“I was just looking at the slats in the wagon” Chad mentions. Nick asks, “And?”
“Begging your pardon” Chad then says “But I don’t think we are going to have quite enough if we are to follow the pattern that Heath here designed. We’re going to run out long before we’re to finish.”
Looking at the slats in the wagon “You’re right Chad” Nick admits “When I went into town to get them in the first place the shipment hadn’t come in as of yet. Tell you what, you keep working and I will go into town and see if they came in. Heath” he then asks “Would you like to come with me? It’ll give us some more time to talk along the way.”
Heath replies, “Don’t know,” grimacing.
“Well I do” Nick says “This is one of the choices you’re gonna be making for yourself. Would you like to come?”
Looking first at Nick not knowing what to do” I don’t know” Heath then looks to each of the men standing there and as they nod their heads replies “If you like Nick.” Nick says, “I like; come on.” Heath asks, “You sure?”
“Quite,” Nick then says, “Who’s the boss here and runs the ranch?” Heath answers, “You Nick.” Nick says, “Then I say it’s alright to do, okay?”
As Heath nods his head and replies, “Okay,” Nick tells him, “Come on.”
And as they quickly go over to the wagon Nick removes the slats and wiring from the back and after placing them on the ground hitches the team back up. He then has Heath climb up into the front. Upon following his lead, “We’ll be back as soon as we could,” Nick informs the men as he grabs hold of the reins and flicking them once begins moving the team.
<p>
Watching them as they leave, “I sure like seeing them starting to get along,” Bobby informs the others.
“Me too,” Ron replies, “For a moment there I almost thought Nick was going to be sending him packing.”
“I’m sure glad it didn’t go that way,” Bobby says, “I like having Heath around.”
“I agree,” Davy replies, “I do too.”
As they resume working, “Say hey Bobby,” Ron says.
“What Ron?” Bobby asks.
“I wonder what” Ron brings up “Some of the men who don’t like his being here are gonna say now. They were looking forward to him making tracks but something tells me that the reversal with Nick has happened and Heath is not going anyplace.”
Bobby replies “I don’t know.” Overhearing “Are you gonna tell them?” Chad asks.
“No,” Ron says, “Are you?” Chad retorts, “No way.”
“Not me” Bobby then says “Let them find out for themselves. They’re in for a big surprise. Each one of them is.” Ron replies, “Agreed.”
<p>
While heading for town and taking in the scenery along the way Nick making idle conversation says to Heath, “Do you know Heath, this is the first time since you came here that we are actually going into town together? I mean side by side in a wagon.” Heath replies, “Yeah.”
Nick says, “Kind of nice.” Seconds later, while riding once again in silence as they scan the various scenery “Heath” Nick asks “Are you okay?” Heath replies, “I’m fine.” Noticing his mind elsewhere “What you thinking about” Nick inquires.
“Me going into town,” Heath admits, “When I should be working.”
“What’s wrong with that?” Nick asks. Heath answers, “Not use to this.”
“You mean going into town,” Nick inquires, “With the boss? Or you’re being given choices to do something on your own?”
“Yeah, I guess” Heath admits, “A little of both.”
“Well I did tell you last night” Nick brings up “You are gonna learn to make choices for yourself.” Heath replies, “You did.”
“And as long as I am the boss” Nick mentions “And I say its okay for you to be doing this then it is, okay?” Nodding his head “Okay,” Heath replies, “I guess.”
“Besides” Nick notes “I still need to learn about you. The only way to do that is for us to keep talking. If I left you working while I went into town I wouldn’t be able to do that and it can be a long drive or ride getting there at times, depending how one looks at it and I figured it would be a great time, a great opportunity for us to go together and talk. There is a whole lot about you that we that I still don’t know about you and we do need to know about you. Just like you need to know about us its part of being family, it’s part of our friendship, knowing one another. Okay?” Heath replies, “Okay.”
“And up until last night” Nick admits “I didn’t give two hoots about you. I had a lot of questions in my head that now I am getting my answers to and I found out that I was so wrong about you and I keep needing to tell you that so you understand that I don’t feel that way about you anymore. That, I do like you here and want you here and won’t ever make your life miserable here ever again.”
Traveling seconds in quiet “I remember” Nick then mentions “Giving you a hard time about not talking or wondering why you didn’t say too much. I won’t do that to you ever again. I do realize some of what I was doing was the result of you becoming more and more quiet. I didn’t realize I was the cause of it until this morning. I have noticed that you’ve also been watching me. You could still do that if you want that doesn’t bother me, I just want you to feel comfortable around me. I don’t want you to feel that you have to be careful when it comes to me, okay?” Once again Heath replies, “Okay.”
“And” Nick adds “I want you to know that the house is also your home now too. And that every bit of the ranch is also yours as well. I don’t want you to have to worry about whether you should be or not because you do belong there now. Okay?” Nodding his head, “Okay,” Heath answers.
After a couple more minutes of traveling quietly “Uh Heath” Nick then says “Another thing is I wanted to tell you that I think I lost my mind thinking that you could put up that fence all by yourself. I won’t ever do something like that again and am truly sorry for doing that to you in the first place.”
Heath not knowing what to say remains quiet, “You know we are okay now, right?” Nick asks of Heath who answers, “I think so, Nick,” a little skittish.
“Well we are now,” Nick mentions. Driving a couple more seconds in quiet and while enjoying the wonderful scenery they pass by Nick then asks if he could ask him a few more questions to which Heath answers, “No Nick, you ask I answer.”
“That’s right! Of course that was a silly question now wasn’t it” Nick then says, “First, maybe when we get to town we just may run into Jarrod there. If so, maybe we could get him to join us in having a drink. It will be your first with your big brothers in town.” Heath mimics, “Big brother?”
“Isn’t that what we are to you?” Nick asks of him who replies, “I guess so. I just never thought of it before.”
Nick says, “I almost didn’t either. But now I do and it has a nice sound to it. I’m gonna like being a big brother to you. I like us being brothers and friends” patting him on the back with his right hand. Heath then replies, “I like that Nick.”
“Well okay” Nick then says “And you know something else?” Heath asks, “What?”
“Just as Jarrod and I are the older brothers or big brothers to you, you are the big brother or the older brother to both Audra and Gene,” Nick points out.
“Yeah,” Heath answers, “I guess so.”
“Okay, first question.” Nick inquires “When you came to here to find out about your family, us, seeing that you need to be told to do everything what made you come here from Strawberry when you did? Did someone tell you to come here?”
Heath replies, “No Nick.” Nick asks, “Then how did you come here? I mean what made you come?”
“After Mama died” Heath explains “Aunt Rachel was telling me about Tom Barkley being my father and the family he had here in Stockton. When I heard that I wasn’t thinking too much. My mind was so angry that I couldn’t think of anything else and just had to come here.”
“I don’t blame you,” Nick says, “I would’ve done the same thing as you did.”
“You would?” Heath asks.
“Yes,” Nick admits, “But let me ask you something.”
“Sure,” Heath replies.
“When you came to the house,” Nick asks, “Did you know what you were getting yourself into?” Heath mimics “Into?”
“I mean when you left Strawberry” Nick says “You knew of us as your father’s family. But did you know what you were gonna do once you came here?”
“I didn’t think that far ahead” Heath admits “I only heard about your father being my father and I had to grow up the way I did and you grew up the way you did; I thought that when I came here I wanted what you had but I didn’t know what it was that you had. Then I saw you” shifting his gaze to the ground “The ranch and then the big house and didn’t know what to do.”
Noticing “Heath” Nick says “Talk to me. What you thinking about?” as he doesn’t say anything “Heath” Nick reiterates “We’re friends, we shook hands last night remember?” Heath replies, “I remember.”
“Well” Nick tells him “That means our friendship is genuine, is real. That means as friends we trust one another. You trust me and I trust you that is how friendship works, right?” Heath replies, “Yeah,” looking at him, “I guess.”
“As friends” Nick says “Friends tell each other things that are on their minds, they share the good with the bad, the happy and the sad things. If you have something on your mind tell me. As a friend I am here to listen. Give our friendship a chance. The only way for it to grow and get stronger is for us to trust each other enough. Now give me a chance Heath.”
Once again Heath just looks at Nick then back at the ground “I don’t know” he replies “It’s just when I heard about all of you I was telling Aunt Rachel and Hannah that I didn’t know why he didn’t want to see me or any of you wanted anything to do with me. I wonder why Mama never told me. I wonder why I had to live the way we did.”
<p>
Lifting Heath’s chin slightly, “We didn’t know about you,” Nick tells him, “At all.”
“I know that now” Heath mentions “And when I came here but I didn’t know at the time I left Strawberry. I thought that none of you wanted anything to do with me because I was just a bastard brother that you didn’t want anything to do with the likes of me.” Nick says, “Heath, what did I tell you?”
Swallowing hard, “Stop saying bastard,” Heath relays.
“Then,” Nick asks, “Why are you still saying it?”
“Don’t know” Heath answers quietly “It’s something I’ve been all my life. You get use to it when it’s been said enough times. It’s a word I heard ever since I remember. People would say it and I hear it and knew they were saying it to me.”
Releasing Heath’s chin and turning his right hand into a fist “Well” Nick tells him “All those people who used that word or said that to you should’ve had their mouths washed out with soap or something. If I was there and heard any of them saying that to you I would’ve taken my fist here and put it right through their faces” and watches as a half smile appears on his face “And as much as I didn’t tell you this before and was giving you a hard time at first I do want you to know that I am glad you left Strawberry and came here when you did.”
Heath asks “You are?” perplexed.
“Yes,” Nick admits, “Because if you hadn’t then I wouldn’t have gotten to know you. And now that I know you, I think I am gonna like having you around.”
“This is so new to me,” Heath states, “I don’t know what to say, Nick.”
“You don’t have to say anything. Just listen,” Nick tells him, “Now the more questions I ask you will only help me to learn about you, okay?”
“Okay,” Heath replies.
“But anytime,” Nick says, “You want to ask me something I am always here and you could ask me any time of the day or night.” Heath replies “Can’t do that.”
“Yes” Nick says “I know you can’t. At least in the eyes of you that is and for now I won’t press it. But in time I do hope you could and will. And I believe the more you are with us the more you are around all of us and get to know us you will find that you could. And” pausing, “You could anytime you want. We will all be there to hear you and listen to you, whether we are all together or whether it’s just any one of us. Don’t be afraid; none of us is going to hurt you. We are your family and we are your friends. We are there for you anytime and all the time. In time you’ll get to know what it is to be a part of our family and I think as time goes on you will feel more comfortable around us and you’ll be able to do all that without any problem. Just let it come by you naturally and it will, okay?”
“Okay Nick,” Heath replies.
“How about we go to your sleeping in the barn?” Nick asks, “Why do you do it?”
“Not use to being in a room,” Heath answers, “Like that.”
“Did you sleep out in the barn,” Nick queries, “Either in Strawberry or at other ranches you worked at?” Heath answers, “Some I did.”
“Was that you’re choosing” Nick asks “Or was that the employers you worked for?” Heath replies, “Some mine, some theirs.”
“At the Wheelers, “Nick inquires, “Did you sleep out in their barn?”
“I did” Heath quickly looking at Nick answers.
“That first night you slept in the bunkhouse,” Nick says, “I remember you just lying there when I told you to get dressed. You had the same look last night when I came into your room to check on you. Were you planning on going out to the barn that night to sleep?” Heath replies, “Yes.”
“Were you waiting to be sure everyone were asleep,” Nick wanted to know, “Before you did that? To make sure they didn’t see you go out there?”
“Yes Nick,” Heath answers.
“Didn’t you sleep in a bed in Strawberry,” Nick asks, “With your mother or uncle?” Heath answers, “Mama I did.”
“But not with your uncle,” Nick asks to which Heath answers, “NO!”
“So,” Nick inquires, “You never slept in a bed by yourself?”
“In hotel,” Heath replies, “Coming to Stockton I did that first night.”
“And,” Nick asks, “How was that?” Heath replies “Didn’t sleep.”
Nick asks, “Why not?” Heath shrugs, “Couldn’t.”
Nick asks, “Did someone tell you that you couldn’t?”
“No,” Heath replies, “Just couldn’t.”
Nick still grilling him in why he can’t sleep in the bed at the hotel Heath finally answers, “I don’t know Nick. I lie there looking around seeing the door closed the windows and just something about that.”
“You mean,” Nick asks, “Being alone and the door closed bothers you?”
“Yeah,” Heath confides, “I don’t like being closed in.”
“What is it that bothers you about the door being closed?” Nick wanted to know.
Answering “Don’t know” Heath glances over at the various vegetation they pass by. Nick asks, “Have you always been bothered by that?”
Nodding his head, “As far back,” Heath responds, “As I could remember.”
“Were you ever in places like that?” Nick wanted to know with Heath asking, “What?”
Nick reiterates “Were you ever in places or rooms that had no windows or doors?” Watching as Heath nods his head, “Like being in the springhouse?”
As Heath looks at Nick then turns away “It’s okay Heath” Nick tells him “I won’t ever do that to you again. I’m sorry I did that to you in the first place, but it won’t happen again.”
After a couple seconds of quiet, “You were okay,” Nick inquires, “When your mama was with you right?” Heath replies, “Yeah.”
Nick says, “But not when you were alone?” Heath responds, “NO.”
“How about,” Nick suggests, “If we see what we could do with getting you to sleep up in your room, okay?” Heath replies, “Okay Nick.”
“But if for some reason” Nick says “You do find yourself going out to the barn will you do me a favor?” Heath asks, “What’s that Nick?”
“Make sure” Nick tells him “You have something warm on your feet; like socks or something. That ground must’ve been cold as you were walking out there, now wasn’t it?” Heath answers “Didn’t think about that.”
“I suppose” Nick says “I didn’t tell you to put socks on to go outside but then again when I left you I had you under the covers. I didn’t know you planned on going out there. If I knew that then I would’ve told you to make sure you had them on.”
Driving along for another couple minutes in silence and upon taking in the scenery Nick casually asks Heath how he likes the drive thus far to which Heath responds, “I like it; very nice.”
After a couple more seconds of mere quiet Nick thinking of how he wants to bring up the next question then coming out with the solution in his head says, “Heath. Mother, Jarrod, Duke and I were talking earlier and Duke mentioned a couple things to us. He said something about your uncle slapping your mother and taking you. What happened? Would you tell me?”
“I don’t know when,” Heath replies, “But he did do that yes.” Nick asks, “Why?”
“He didn’t want us leaving Strawberry,” Heath explains, “Mama did; she wanted us to get away from there.” Nick asks, “So, what did he do?”
“He came after us,” Heath says, “Mama tried fighting him off and told him to leave us alone. I tried helping her, I tried fighting him too but my uncle didn’t like it, he hit me and I was sort of pushed to the ground. I fell and then he slapped Mama, he had Mr. Wells and Mr. Moore take hold of me, they picked me up and took me back to Strawberry with them.”
“Who are Mr. Wells and Mr. Moore?” Nick wanted to know.
“Friends to my uncle,” Heath mentions.
“So,” Nick asks, “They took you back to Strawberry with them?” Heath replies, “They did.” Nick asks, “What about your mama?”
“They left her,” Heath answers, “Crying there.”
“She went back to Strawberry?” Nick queries.
“Yes” Heath says “She wanted to go but didn’t want to with me not with her.”
“Duke,” Nick brings up, “Also mentioned about when he asked you about me that you saw me as others. Have others you met or worked with do a lot of yelling or talking harshly or badly to you?” Nodding his head, “Yes, “Heath answers softly.
“Sorry about that Heath” Nick replies “I hope you don’t see me being like them.” Heath says “Not now, no.” Nick asks “But up until last night you did, right?”
Heath not answering just turns away and looks at the scenery they pass by “I” Nick notes “Guess that tells me your answer. It’s alright; I want to know these things. I need to know what I can about you so every little bit helps that includes the bad and the good. That’s the only way I could learn too from what I say and do,” driving along again for a couple more minutes in silence “Heath” Nick then says “From that very first day you came to live here with all of us you kept watching me. Were you wondering when I would start hitting you? Did you think that I or the rest of the family would at any time hit or whip you? Was that running around your head all that time?”
As Heath swallows hard and is just looking at him, “It never occurred to me that is what was going through your head. I just thought that it was your being new here. I do understand now,” Nick then asks of him, “You do know that I would never do anything like that to you right?”
Swallowing hard again, “Starting to,” Heath admits, “Wasn’t sure though, but did wonder.” Nick asks, “Wonder what Heath?” Heath answers, “When you would.”
“You mean put you in your place” Nick wanted to know “Know where you belong?” watching as Heath nods his head “Well, it’s not gonna happen. Not now, not ever. I don’t do that kind of thing. You need to get that through your head and get it in enough so that you believe it” glancing down at him while he continues driving “And I mean it Heath” raising his voice slightly “Never! And neither would the rest of the family, you got that?” Heath replies “Got it Nick.”
“I hope so,” Nick then says, “Another thing Duke brought up was something about when you were in your uncle’s home or hotel you weren’t allowed to talk unless you were asked something.” Heath replies, “Yes.”
“Your uncle,” Nick asks, “Didn’t like you talking at all?”
“No,” Heath answers, “I had to remain silent and he made sure I did just that.”
“Did he punish you for talking?” Nick wanted to know. Heath answers, “Some.”
“From hearing about him,” Nick says, “Your uncle was pretty bad to you but could I ask why? I mean why he was so bad to you?”
Shrugging his shoulders, “Not know,” Heath answers softly and as he glances down at his legs mentions, “I just know that he hated me.”
“Hated you?” Nick asks, “Why Heath?”
“Don’t really know,” Heath replies, “I guess he blames me for my mama. For not being able to find someone and get married and live a much better life than what she was living. He did what he could to keep me away from her.”
“How did he do that?” Nick wanted to know.
“He’d keep me at the hotel,” Heath answers, “When a job came he had me work.”
“I understand you worked in the mines,” Nick brings up.
“I did work in the mines,” Heath answers strongly, “Was charge boy.”
Doing a double take “A charge boy?” Nick inquires “You threw charges into the mines?” Heath answers, “I did.”
“Why did you do that kind of work?” Nick asks.
“Had to,” Heath replies, “Was one of the few who could fit in there,” looking straight at Nick, “To do it.”
As Nick asks him how old he was Heath shrugs his shoulders and responds, “Six.”
“Six?” Nick being taken back asks “You were six years old working in there?”
Heath states, “I was.”
Still in a state of shock, “Are you for real?” Nick asks, “Are you serious? You were actually working in the mines when you were six?” Heath answers, “I am.”
Studying Heath’s face for a moment, “You really are,” Nick notes.
Looking directly at Nick, “Yes,” Heath responds.
“Did your mama,” Nick wanted to know, “Like you doing that kind of work?”
“No,” Heath answers, “She wanted me to stop but uncle didn’t. So I had to.”
“Didn’t you attend school?” Nick inquires. Heath mentions, “Went to school.”
“Then,” Nick ponders, “How is it you worked in the mines? When school was done for the day?”
“No,” Heath explains, “No more school. Had me go to mine, had to work, had to stay there.”
“Why would your uncle want you working in a mine?” Nick asks, “Instead of going to school?”
Shrugging shoulders “Not know” Heath answers “Just had to. Money, I guess. Not like me so didn’t much matter to me. My kind didn’t need school. No use
come of it.” Nick mimics, “No use come of it?” Heath states, “NO!”
“Throwing charges into a mine,” Nick surmises, “You could’ve gotten yourself killed. Didn’t your uncle even think of that?”
“Not think so,” Heath mentions, “Probably wanted that.”
Nick asks, “He wanted you dead?” Heath states, “He did.”
“Tell me something,” Nick asks, “What came first, the school or the working in the mine?” Heath answers, “School.”
“So,” Nick says, “Working in the mine came after that?” Heath replies, “It did.”
“You said,” Nick brings up, “Your mama tried leaving Strawberry with you.”
“She did,” Heath reiterates, “But didn’t get to.”
“Which came first,” Nick inquires, “Working in the mine or her leaving Strawberry with you?” Heath answers, “Working in mine.”
“Were you still working in the mines when she left Strawberry or did that happen when you no longer worked there?” Nick wanted to know.
Heath replies, “Still working.”
“How long did you work in the mines?” Nick inquires.
Shrugging shoulders, “Not know. Awhile” Heath answers.
“So, you went to school, but stopped when you started going to work in the mines, and while you were working in them, your mama left Strawberry with you, but you and her didn’t get far, and your uncle came after you, and then you went back to working in the mines.” Nick says.
Nodding his head while looking up at Nick Heath replies, “Uh-huh.”
<p>
Exhaling heavily but getting away from that topic at the moment Nick decides to ask him questions regarding his work on the various ranches he went to and upon asking him if he got them on his own or if his uncle set them up for him Heath responds “Some uncle set up. I had to do it. They made sure I did.”
“How’s that?” Nick asks, “They didn’t let you go if you wanted to?”
Shaking his head “NO!” Heath answers.
“Did your Uncle have something to do with your working with the Wheelers?” Nick wanted to know to which Heath nods and answers, “He did.”
“And when you worked for them,” Nick asks, “They didn’t allow you to leave?”
“No,” Heath replies again.
“How long did you work for them?” Nick inquires to which Heath shrugs his shoulders and answers, “Don’t know; awhile.”
“The ranches you worked at,” Nick wanted to know, “Did you work at them after you worked in the mines?” Heath replies, “I did.”
“Did you ever work in the hotel for your uncle?” Nick asks of Heath to which he replies again, “I did.”
As Nick asks what kind of work he had him do Heath explains “Anything given. Scrubbing floors, clean dishes, table, peel potatoes.”
Nick then curiously asks, “Did he pay you for doing that?” Heath replies, “No.”
“You know” Nick brings up “When we went out that first day and I was showing you around I remember asking you about your working away from Strawberry and you said you had to.” Heath answers, “I did have to.”
“Was being confined,” Nick inquires, “Part of their holding you?”
Heath not answering looks first at Nick and then at the ground “It’s alright Heath” Nick says “You don’t have to say anything. I’m getting my answers. I just need to know and I’m beginning to understand the-had to part now. When you first said it I didn’t but now I do. I just wanted to let you know that and even though I did give you a hard time at the beginning doesn’t mean I wasn’t listening to you. I did hear everything you were saying, I just wasn’t ready to accept you as of yet. But now I am, I just wanted to make sure you knew that and that you heard it from me,” Heath once again shows a partial grin.
<p>
Riding for a couple more seconds of quiet and enjoying the scenery they are passing by Nick then asks “Heath, your uncle really hated you that much?”
“He did,” Heath answers, “He thought by keeping me away that Mama could find someone but Mama wouldn’t. Sometimes I wish I weren’t born, like Uncle wanted. Maybe if someone did away with me earlier on things for my mama would’ve been better. Since I was born Mama had to live with people calling us names, no one wanted anything to do with us except Aunt Rachel and Hannah. A couple asked her to send me away but she wouldn’t. She would say I was the most important person in her life that I came first no matter what. I always felt bad for her and thinking if I weren’t there then maybe she could’ve done better.”
Nick bringing the wagon to a complete stop and without warning Heath not knowing what to make of it tenses up and quickly jumps down off the wagon. Quickly jumping down, Nick chases after him. As Nick calls out to him “Hey Heath, wait!” he continues running.
<p>
Nick racing after him Heath continues making tracks and as he tries catching up to him Heath keeps on running without stopping; Nick picking up speed and thinking fast leaps up and onto him resulting in them both dropping to the ground.
<p>
While Nick quickly tackles him to the ground Heath struggles to break free and upon rolling onto his back Nick places a firm grip on his shoulders telling him “Settle down Heath” who is breathing heavily, trembling and letting out little whimpers “Settle down! I didn’t mean to startle you! Stop!”
Watching as he continues trying to wiggle free “I am not gonna hurt you. I’m sorry. Take it easy” as he keeps his grip on him says “Heath, listen to me. It’s alright, its okay. Take it easy. I’m not gonna hurt you. Everything is fine. I assure you. You have to stop being so jumpy. I just want to talk. Trust me will you?” waiting patiently as he slowly begins to calm down “That’s it Heath, just relax.”
As he shifts his position slightly and takes hold of his arm with one hand and his chin in the other while keeping his strong hold on him looks straight into his eyes and as Heath looks at him “Heath” keeping a fix on them “You should never think less of yourself” Nick tells him “Everyone on this earth has a reason for being here. Your mother thought a lot of you and you were the most important person in her life. Mothers think a lot of their children. They are the most important things in their lives.”
“But” Heath mentions “All it did was cause her trouble” continuing to look up at Nick who replies “But it wasn’t your fault. It’s just something that happened.”
“Maybe,” Heath says as Nick continues to lock eye contact with him, “But if she didn’t have me her life wouldn’t have been like that.”
“Heath,” Nick tells him, “You don’t know that. No one could know how another one’s life is gonna turn out. You’re just as important here as anybody else is. Whatever the circumstances are or were that should not make a difference. IF she didn’t have you maybe her life could’ve been worse than what she had.”
“If you weren’t born” he adds “Then you wouldn’t have grown up to be who you are now. And I wouldn’t have had an opportunity to have met you. I still don’t know you at all but I wouldn’t have known you at all if you didn’t come here. I wouldn’t have known you existed. Everyone here has a reason or a purpose for living.” Heath asks, “What is my purpose or reason for living, except to cause someone trouble?”
“You’re being here is purpose enough,” Nick states, “No one can know for sure what their purpose here is. One day you may find out then again you may not,” letting out a little chuckle, “Maybe your purpose here is to keep me in line.”
Heath asks, “How’s that?”
“You helped me to see how bad I was” Nick confides “I didn’t really realize it until last night. You were comparing me to others that you had to work for. Now, I could very well have been like that, I would never have realized it. You’re being here helped that. You have more courage than you could possibly know, Heath. Right now, you think that you could only talk when someone asks you something but you’re not afraid to say things. You tell it straight out. I have a feeling that once you start to loosen up and come to realize that you could talk all you want and when you want there will be no stopping you; there will be no shutting you up. And you want to know something?” Heath asks, “What?”
“I hope you do,” Nick tells him, “I want to hear you talking. I want to hear what you have to say. If you should see or hear me doing something that you don’t think is right or could be said or done differently I want to hear that too. You could always come to me and tell me that. You’re also filling a void that I had.”
“A void…” Heath cutting him off asks.
“Yes” Nick replies “An emptiness; something that has been missing when Father died. It hasn’t been the same running the ranch by myself. As much as you are new here I am just as new at running the ranch. I mean I learned all there is to know about working it but the actually running it and knowing how much I need something like putting up a fence let’s say for instance, that is the first fence I had put in since I have been given control of all of that. Perhaps as time goes on when you’ve been here awhile and things get easier and you know all there is to know and you feel more comfortable there and we feel more comfortable with each other then perhaps maybe you may like to help me run it. You already did a great job with designing and putting up the bridge and now the fence. Some of what you did to them we never thought of or would’ve thought of. But you did it completely on your own. So who knows what other ideas you have inside your head? You just might have more that could very well help the ranch out in a good way. Maybe we could run it side by side. And you want to know something?”
As Nick is releasing his hold on him Heath sitting up asks, “What?”
“Here and now,” Nick tells him, “It has a nice sound to it. What do you think?”
“Don’t know,” Heath answers. Nick asks, “Would you or do you think you would be interested?”
“Not sure,” Heath replies, “Never thought that far ahead. All I thought about was coming here, nothing more.”
Noticing him trembling, “Heath,” Nick touching him asks, “Why does this bother you so much, me touching you like this? You’re trembling terribly?”
“Don’t know,” Heath replies. Holding his arms out, “Come here,” Nick says.
“What?” Heath asks with Nick saying, “Just come here,” and at first resisting and trying to pull back Nick quickly grabs hold of his arms and pulls him into his and still feeling him trembling as he draws him to his chest, “Shh, it’s okay! It’s okay now, I am here Heath. Hush! Shh! It’s alright.”
As Heath’s arms are dangling by his side and he’s looking towards the ground unemotional “See Heath?” Nick tells him “Its okay, it’s okay!” comforting and rocking him in his arms slightly then asks “Heath, when was the last time someone did this for you?”
“Mama did,” Heath mentions, “Aunt Rachel did; Hannah did. Don’t remember when though.” Nick asks, “Was it recently or longer than that?”
Shrugging his shoulders, “Longer,” Heath mumbles, “Don’t know.”
“I am full of surprises,” Nick mentions, “You are probably thinking inside your head, right?” Heath nods his head but doesn’t say anything.
“It’s okay,” Nick tells him, “You’re gonna have to get use to me and others doing things like this with you. This is some of what it is to be part of a family, our family or being a friend who cares. And I just thought you could use one of these right now,” holding him close to him, Nick says, “Uh Heath,” still comforting him.
“Yeah,” Heath replies.
Nick tells him “You definitely have to start eating more I could feel the bones in your back” as he moves Heath out of his arms and looking into his eyes once again “I mean it Heath” he says “You have to start eating more” gripping the sides of Heath’s face in his hands and running the thumbs along side each jaw.
As he starts looking away “You hear me?” Nick asks of him who responds “I hear Nick.”
“Well okay,” Nick says sternly, “Uh Heath?”
Replying “Yeah” Heath looks back up at Nick.
“I also meant what I said,” Nick says, “I don’t want you to ever start thinking less of yourself or thinking you have no purpose here. You got that?”
Slowly nodding his head, “I’ll try,” he states.
Replying, “Good boy,” Nick lightly pats his cheeks with his hands.
Heath then says, “Nick.” Nick asks, “Yes Heath?”
“Mama use to tell me some of that,” Heath confides.
“You mean about your thinking less of yourself?” Nick wanted to know.
Nodding his head, “Yeah,” Heath answers, “She said something like that. She said I was her golden little angel, her special gift from god. And she said something like your mother said to be proud of who I am.”
“Well” Nick says “You need to listen to what she told you because she’s right. Mothers are usually right anyway, that’s their job. But just remember what they told you, my mother as well as yours to be proud of whom you are. Don’t ever change because of someone else. Be who you are! Too bad your mother wasn’t here now I would love to have met her. She sounds like one heck of a woman.”
Showing a smile but then looking away “She was” Heath answers softly but proudly.
“You know Heath” Nick mentions “That is the first real smile I’ve seen on your face since you’ve been here. It’s nice to see and your mother must’ve been to have a grown up son like that. And as I told you last night as I am telling you again now that I will always be there for you. Just remember that, okay? You are no longer alone anymore. You have me right there beside you, okay?” holding his chin in his hand. Heath replies, “Okay.”
Nick then says “And Heath” to who answers “Yes Nick?”
“I mean what I said,” Nick says, “About your running the ranch with me. You don’t have to give me your answer right now. It just sort of came out of my mouth without me thinking but as I said it does have a nice ring to it. We’ll take it all slow as I also mentioned before. Once you get familiar with everything and you’re more comfortable being around me, the men, the ranch, we’ll bring it up again, okay? I won’t rush you. We’ll take everything one day at a time. And who knows, it just might come naturally to you without warning.”
“Okay Nick” Heath answers “We’ll see what happens.”
Asking him one more question Nick says, “I know you didn’t have much schooling but do you know how to read and write?” Heath answers, “I know how to read and write.”
“Well okay,” Nick states, “I just wanted to know. How about we get back in the wagon and resume heading for town?”
“Okay,” Heath answers.
Holding his hand out, “Here,” Nick says, “Let me help you up,” and with that Heath taking hold of the extended hand Nick helps him get back on his feet.
<p>
Getting back in the wagon Nick takes back the reins and starts driving again.
<p>
A few minutes later arriving in town of Stockton “Well” Nick announces “Here we are. Let’s take this wagon over to the lumber mill and see if the shipment came in. If it did and while they are loading it we will see about finding Jarrod and having a drink together. How’s that sound to you?”
“Sounds fine to me Nick” Heath replies with Nick mimicking “Well, sounds fine to me too. Let’s go.”
<p>
As Nick and Heath head down to the lumber mill Victoria takes a trip out to the gravesite. Kneeling before the headstone, closing her eyes “Oh Tom” she says “The breakthrough we have been waiting for has finally happened. Nick has finally accepted Heath.”
Letting out a little grin “You have no idea on how happy that makes me feel” she continues “Maybe now that boy will feel a part of this family. I know it’s what you would’ve wanted and in a rare sense of the word he is the last gift of yours that you could ever bring to the family. I think he will be good for Nick. I think he is the balance to keeping him on his toes.”
“But whatever ever happens” she mentions “I just want Heath to share in it, to be a part of it with the entire family; his working side by side with Nick. We still have much to learn about him but it’s a beginning. That young man has truly had a very hard and rough life. It’s so sad how he had to grow up like that but it won’t get any harder or rougher. We will all do what we have to, to help him. Even Duke, will be helping. He is sort of the surrogate father figure for him that he could use. I’m sure you would like that. He also has Jarrod and Nick.”
“He is now opening up” she says “Nick got it moving and somehow I knew he would be the key to getting him to do so. Oh Tom, I sure wish you were here to see him. You would be very pleased. He is a very nice young man. You would be proud to be his father and very proud to have him as your son.”
“You know this is the first trip” she adds “I’ve made out here since it happened. I didn’t or couldn’t face coming up here before. But now I guess I am ready to do so. Maybe that’s another good thing that has come from Heath’s coming to us; getting all of us out of our slumps. Each one of us hasn’t been able to go on as quickly as we had liked to, but now I think we are truly ready. At least I am. I just hope each of the children are as well.”
“Well Tom” she says “I just came up here to tell you about Heath, I will make another visit here real soon. It won’t take another six months to do that anymore. I love you” giving the grave a quick kiss “And always will. You are in my heart night and day” she then gets up, mounts her horse and heads back to the ranch.
<p>
Bringing the wagon to a complete stop outside Bob’s Mill, Nick climbing out of it has Heath coming with him inside the store. Upon entering Nick placing his hand on the back of Heath’s shoulders says, “Hi Bob, I like for you to meet someone. This is Heath.”
Holding out his hand Bob replies “hello,” who reciprocates with saying “Hi sir.”
Bob asks “He’s new around here?” Nick replies “Yes, he is.”
As he is asked if he works for him Nick answers “In a way. He’s not any ordinary worker” placing his hand on Heath’s back he says proudly “He is my brother.”
“Your brother” Bob mystified asks, “How’s that?”
“Just is” Nick says “We just learned about him and he just came to live with us.”
“I think I remember seeing him at the services we had for Frank and Harry. But I just thought he was one of the visiting friends to them” Bob notes.
“Well,” Nick replies, “He’s not.”
As Bob asks Heath where he’s from Heath tells him, “Strawberry.”
“Hey,” Bob retorts, “No kidding. I remember your father owning a mine there way back when Nick.”
Answering, “We know,” Nick then changes the subject quickly and asks if the new shipment came in yet to which Bob informs him it has. Nick tells him he will take what he has available and come back later for what they need.
Bob says, “That sounds fair. I could give you 200 slats.”
Replying, “That’ll be fine,” Nick asks him to have them loaded up in the wagon and informs him he’ll be back for them in a little bit.
“Oh sure,” Bob tells him, “No problem.”
Nick then says, “Come on Heath,” and with that they walk out of the mill together with one of the men nearby listening to the conversation between Bob and Nick comes over and says, “So, a new brother.”
“Hey,” Bob tells him, “Mind your own business Paul. How he came to them is their business not ours. I pay you to work, now get to work.”
Replying, “Yes sir,” the man returns to what he was doing.
<p>
Traveling down the street side by side Nick says to Heath, “Let’s go see where Jarrod is hiding.”
<p>
Walking idly looking about hoping to see Jarrod Nick asks Heath if he sees him anywhere to which he responds “No I don’t” as he looks to each side of the street, to each building or person they pass by.
Nick then says, “Let’s go to his office, if he’s not there we will wait for him.”
Replying “Yeah okay” Heath and Nick while heading for Jarrod’s office Nick inquires “Do you remember where it is?” with Heath answering “I remember.”
Nick then asks, “Heath, which hotel did you stay at the night you came here?”
Replying, “I’ll show you,” Heath points to the one on the right, “That one,” he mentions. Nick asks, “Is that the one you brought Audra to?”
“When she came to town,” Heath states, “I saw her trying to fight off some of the men that grabbed for her and took hold of her fast and ran up the stairs and fixed her arm up that got hurt.”
“I like to thank you for that,” Nick says, “Audra can be a little on the wild side,” chuckling, “At times she has a little of me in her.”
“I could see that,” Heath notes, “She told me she likes to do what she wants.”
“She does,” Nick admits, “We do all have a tendency of spoiling her because she is the only girl, our only sister. But we also have to watch her too so that no harm does come to her. Sometimes, I think she lives in a dream world, expecting things to be differently than what they truly are.” Heath says, “I could understand that.”
“Hopefully” Nick sighs “She’ll grow up to realize that it’s not that tame out there; that things can get a little hairy out there at times” arriving at Jarrod’s Law Office “Well,” glancing at the door “Here we are Heath” Nick says “Let’s go in.” Opening the door he is met and greeted by Miss Haas’ Jarrod’s secretary.
Upon removing his hat Nick asks of her, “Has my brother Jarrod come by yet?”
“No,” she replies, “Not yet.”
Nick informs her “We’ll wait for him in his office when he comes tell him we’re in here.” Replying “Sure Nick” Miss Haas glancing over at Heath asks “Um, who is this with you?”
As Nick introduces him to Miss Haas, Heath removes his hat nods and replies “Howdy Ma’am.”
Returning the greeting Miss Haas says, “I remember you from the other day when Jarrod brought you in with him.” Heath replies, “Yes Ma’am.”
Nick says “This here is my brother.” Doing a double take “Your brother?” she mimics.
“Yes,” Nick replies, “Come on,” he then says to Heath who follows him into Jarrod’s private office.
<p>
Jarrod, coming out of the Pinkerton’s Agency walks up the street and after making a quick trip to the telegraph office and finding there aren’t any wires for them crosses the street.
TBC
While Jarrod goes to get Jingo saddled up Nick returns to the house and is met by Victoria handing him a lunch for Heath. Thanking her “I will make sure he is eating his lunch” Nick informs her who then asks, “Where is Jarrod going?”
“Into town,” Nick mentions, “To see if there is anything on that investigation he has going and wanted to find out if there are any cases for him.”
“How do you feel about that Nick?” Victoria inquires.
“It no longer matters to me” Nick states “As much as I wanted it done at first I want him here regardless of what it should come to say. He does need someone like me to care about him and he could use a friend; a big brother,” with a smile showing, “And you were right when you said he does need some understanding and patience. And I’ll tell you I’m going to be the best big brother, the best friend that boy could ever want or need. It just took a little longer than the rest of you to see that. But you want to know something?” Victoria asks, “What Nick?”
“Here and now, the sound of big brother” Nick replies, “Has a nice sound to it.”
Taking hold of his cheek “Well Nick” Victoria says “I knew you had it in you. I just wondered how long it was going to take before you found that out.”
“Well, I found it” Nick tells her “I no longer have any bad feelings regarding him. I just feel so bad for what he went through. I’m gonna do all I can to get him on his feet.” Victoria says “That is all I ever wanted from you Nick.”
Still smiling, “I know,” Nick states, “I could be mule-headed at times.”
“I won’t argue with you on that” Victoria says “But you were right too. Your father did leave the ranch to you and keeping us all safe. You were only doing what you thought was right. I won’t fault you for that and you do have a caring heart.”
“You knew from that very first day,” Nick mentions, “That there was something more to him.”
“I did yes,” Victoria confides, “I could see it in him as well as hear it in his voice that there was something more to him, something deeper than any of us knew. I just didn’t realize just how rough.”
“Well” Nick states “It won’t get any deeper or rougher than it has. He has me now and I won’t allow anyone to ever hurt him again. I do understand now some of what you were trying to get across to me last night and you were right. His being here is the right thing to do, he belongs here with us. Well” giving her a kiss on the cheek “I better be going. I’ll see you tonight when the kids get home from school.” Victoria then says “Good luck with what you could get out of him, Nick.”
“I’ll do my best,” Nick promises and taking hold of Heath’s lunch he heads out to the barn and retrieves his horse. Placing the lunch in Coco’s saddlebag he walks her out into the open, mounts up and heads off to the North Pasture.
<p>
Returning to the kitchen to give Silas a hand with cleaning it up “Silas” Victoria says “You knew of Heath sleeping out in the barn since that first night he came to live with us.” Silas answers, “I did, yes, Miz Barkley.”
Victoria asks, “Could I ask you how come you didn’t say anything until now?”
“It wasn’t for me to say Miz Barkley” Silas says “Sometimes it’s best to find out for yourself; if I mentioned it to you when I first knew of it, it could’ve gone worse.”
“Gone worse?” Victoria perplexed asks “How so?”
“If I said something” Silas explains “You would’ve probably have told him to sleep inside and that might’ve done more harm than good. He does what you tell him and if he’s been living a very sheltered life for so long he may have seen being told to stay in his room as a type of prison. Mr. Heath had a lot of bad things happen to him. So, telling him to stay in his room to sleep just would’ve been worse. You understand, Miz Barkley?’
Nodding her head, “I understand,” Victoria admits.
Silas mentions “Now that you’re aware maybe you’ll find a way to do it without it bothering him.”
“Could I ask,” Victoria inquires, “How is it that you knew since that first night?”
“He always came in from the outside” Silas states “Each morning he never came down the stairs only up the walk. So I figured it out rather quickly. None of you noticed or were aware because no one was really paying much attention to it. You were looking at things on the surface or what you assumed to be but not how it actually was.” Victoria replies, “I see what you mean.”
“And with Mr. Nick’s mind elsewhere,” Silas adds, “I think all of you were in some ways too. You expect him to be living differently than the way he really was.”
“I guess we do have a lot to learn” Victoria surmises “And a lot of work ahead of us to do with him.”
“Yes” Silas notes “You do. He spent many years living the life he had. It’s not something that will happen over night or miraculously. It’s going to take time, patience and understanding.”
Victoria says, “That is what I was telling Nick.”
“I know” Silas admits “I heard some of what you were telling him the other night. But it’s gonna take the entire family and I mean the entire family including me to get him to where he needs to be.”
Victoria replies, “You’re right Silas; it is!”
<p>
Arriving up at the North Pasture Nick catches sight of Bobby, Ron, Chad, Davy and Heath busily working together in erecting the fence. After taking care of Coco he greets the men as he comes over to them who in turn reply, “Hi, Mr. Barkley.”
Not hearing Heath’s voice Nick walks over to him and says, “Hello Heath,” who glances up at him and responds, “Hi Nick.”
“I didn’t hear your voice,” Nick then says, “I was worried. You okay?”
“I,” Heath replies, “Okay.” Nick says, “Well, just checking. How’s it coming?” he asks all of them with Ron answering, “Oh, it’s coming.”
Looking at how much got done thus far and how it looks “Oh Heath” Nick asks “Did you do all of this?” noticing the posts lined up across one side about 10 of them and then the wired fence attached to some of the posts with wooden slats over them going horizontally across with four slats per section.
“I believe he has Mr. Barkley,” Ron responds.
With Bobby adding, “Yeah, when we got here this was done already.”
“I knew it was late last night when I came up here so I didn’t pay much attention to it at the time but Heath, this is very nice; very good!” Nick then asks, “Where did you learn to do something like this?”
Shrugging his shoulders, “Not know,” Heath answers, “Saw it somewhere.”
“One of the ranches you worked at?” Nick asks. Heath says “Not know; maybe.”
“Well this is great, really is” Nick insists “However, let’s talk some more later I am here to give you a hand” grabbing one of the hammers from the wagon he joins them in putting up the fence “And at noontime, we will stop and have lunch together. How’s that sound Heath?”
While working “Sounds good Nick” Heath replies with Nick saying “Sounds good to me too.” Chad then cuts in “Uh, Mr. Barkley?” Nick replies, “Yes Chad?”
“I was just looking at the slats in the wagon” Chad mentions. Nick asks, “And?”
“Begging your pardon” Chad then says “But I don’t think we are going to have quite enough if we are to follow the pattern that Heath here designed. We’re going to run out long before we’re to finish.”
Looking at the slats in the wagon “You’re right Chad” Nick admits “When I went into town to get them in the first place the shipment hadn’t come in as of yet. Tell you what, you keep working and I will go into town and see if they came in. Heath” he then asks “Would you like to come with me? It’ll give us some more time to talk along the way.”
Heath replies, “Don’t know,” grimacing.
“Well I do” Nick says “This is one of the choices you’re gonna be making for yourself. Would you like to come?”
Looking first at Nick not knowing what to do” I don’t know” Heath then looks to each of the men standing there and as they nod their heads replies “If you like Nick.” Nick says, “I like; come on.” Heath asks, “You sure?”
“Quite,” Nick then says, “Who’s the boss here and runs the ranch?” Heath answers, “You Nick.” Nick says, “Then I say it’s alright to do, okay?”
As Heath nods his head and replies, “Okay,” Nick tells him, “Come on.”
And as they quickly go over to the wagon Nick removes the slats and wiring from the back and after placing them on the ground hitches the team back up. He then has Heath climb up into the front. Upon following his lead, “We’ll be back as soon as we could,” Nick informs the men as he grabs hold of the reins and flicking them once begins moving the team.
<p>
Watching them as they leave, “I sure like seeing them starting to get along,” Bobby informs the others.
“Me too,” Ron replies, “For a moment there I almost thought Nick was going to be sending him packing.”
“I’m sure glad it didn’t go that way,” Bobby says, “I like having Heath around.”
“I agree,” Davy replies, “I do too.”
As they resume working, “Say hey Bobby,” Ron says.
“What Ron?” Bobby asks.
“I wonder what” Ron brings up “Some of the men who don’t like his being here are gonna say now. They were looking forward to him making tracks but something tells me that the reversal with Nick has happened and Heath is not going anyplace.”
Bobby replies “I don’t know.” Overhearing “Are you gonna tell them?” Chad asks.
“No,” Ron says, “Are you?” Chad retorts, “No way.”
“Not me” Bobby then says “Let them find out for themselves. They’re in for a big surprise. Each one of them is.” Ron replies, “Agreed.”
<p>
While heading for town and taking in the scenery along the way Nick making idle conversation says to Heath, “Do you know Heath, this is the first time since you came here that we are actually going into town together? I mean side by side in a wagon.” Heath replies, “Yeah.”
Nick says, “Kind of nice.” Seconds later, while riding once again in silence as they scan the various scenery “Heath” Nick asks “Are you okay?” Heath replies, “I’m fine.” Noticing his mind elsewhere “What you thinking about” Nick inquires.
“Me going into town,” Heath admits, “When I should be working.”
“What’s wrong with that?” Nick asks. Heath answers, “Not use to this.”
“You mean going into town,” Nick inquires, “With the boss? Or you’re being given choices to do something on your own?”
“Yeah, I guess” Heath admits, “A little of both.”
“Well I did tell you last night” Nick brings up “You are gonna learn to make choices for yourself.” Heath replies, “You did.”
“And as long as I am the boss” Nick mentions “And I say its okay for you to be doing this then it is, okay?” Nodding his head “Okay,” Heath replies, “I guess.”
“Besides” Nick notes “I still need to learn about you. The only way to do that is for us to keep talking. If I left you working while I went into town I wouldn’t be able to do that and it can be a long drive or ride getting there at times, depending how one looks at it and I figured it would be a great time, a great opportunity for us to go together and talk. There is a whole lot about you that we that I still don’t know about you and we do need to know about you. Just like you need to know about us its part of being family, it’s part of our friendship, knowing one another. Okay?” Heath replies, “Okay.”
“And up until last night” Nick admits “I didn’t give two hoots about you. I had a lot of questions in my head that now I am getting my answers to and I found out that I was so wrong about you and I keep needing to tell you that so you understand that I don’t feel that way about you anymore. That, I do like you here and want you here and won’t ever make your life miserable here ever again.”
Traveling seconds in quiet “I remember” Nick then mentions “Giving you a hard time about not talking or wondering why you didn’t say too much. I won’t do that to you ever again. I do realize some of what I was doing was the result of you becoming more and more quiet. I didn’t realize I was the cause of it until this morning. I have noticed that you’ve also been watching me. You could still do that if you want that doesn’t bother me, I just want you to feel comfortable around me. I don’t want you to feel that you have to be careful when it comes to me, okay?” Once again Heath replies, “Okay.”
“And” Nick adds “I want you to know that the house is also your home now too. And that every bit of the ranch is also yours as well. I don’t want you to have to worry about whether you should be or not because you do belong there now. Okay?” Nodding his head, “Okay,” Heath answers.
After a couple more minutes of traveling quietly “Uh Heath” Nick then says “Another thing is I wanted to tell you that I think I lost my mind thinking that you could put up that fence all by yourself. I won’t ever do something like that again and am truly sorry for doing that to you in the first place.”
Heath not knowing what to say remains quiet, “You know we are okay now, right?” Nick asks of Heath who answers, “I think so, Nick,” a little skittish.
“Well we are now,” Nick mentions. Driving a couple more seconds in quiet and while enjoying the wonderful scenery they pass by Nick then asks if he could ask him a few more questions to which Heath answers, “No Nick, you ask I answer.”
“That’s right! Of course that was a silly question now wasn’t it” Nick then says, “First, maybe when we get to town we just may run into Jarrod there. If so, maybe we could get him to join us in having a drink. It will be your first with your big brothers in town.” Heath mimics, “Big brother?”
“Isn’t that what we are to you?” Nick asks of him who replies, “I guess so. I just never thought of it before.”
Nick says, “I almost didn’t either. But now I do and it has a nice sound to it. I’m gonna like being a big brother to you. I like us being brothers and friends” patting him on the back with his right hand. Heath then replies, “I like that Nick.”
“Well okay” Nick then says “And you know something else?” Heath asks, “What?”
“Just as Jarrod and I are the older brothers or big brothers to you, you are the big brother or the older brother to both Audra and Gene,” Nick points out.
“Yeah,” Heath answers, “I guess so.”
“Okay, first question.” Nick inquires “When you came to here to find out about your family, us, seeing that you need to be told to do everything what made you come here from Strawberry when you did? Did someone tell you to come here?”
Heath replies, “No Nick.” Nick asks, “Then how did you come here? I mean what made you come?”
“After Mama died” Heath explains “Aunt Rachel was telling me about Tom Barkley being my father and the family he had here in Stockton. When I heard that I wasn’t thinking too much. My mind was so angry that I couldn’t think of anything else and just had to come here.”
“I don’t blame you,” Nick says, “I would’ve done the same thing as you did.”
“You would?” Heath asks.
“Yes,” Nick admits, “But let me ask you something.”
“Sure,” Heath replies.
“When you came to the house,” Nick asks, “Did you know what you were getting yourself into?” Heath mimics “Into?”
“I mean when you left Strawberry” Nick says “You knew of us as your father’s family. But did you know what you were gonna do once you came here?”
“I didn’t think that far ahead” Heath admits “I only heard about your father being my father and I had to grow up the way I did and you grew up the way you did; I thought that when I came here I wanted what you had but I didn’t know what it was that you had. Then I saw you” shifting his gaze to the ground “The ranch and then the big house and didn’t know what to do.”
Noticing “Heath” Nick says “Talk to me. What you thinking about?” as he doesn’t say anything “Heath” Nick reiterates “We’re friends, we shook hands last night remember?” Heath replies, “I remember.”
“Well” Nick tells him “That means our friendship is genuine, is real. That means as friends we trust one another. You trust me and I trust you that is how friendship works, right?” Heath replies, “Yeah,” looking at him, “I guess.”
“As friends” Nick says “Friends tell each other things that are on their minds, they share the good with the bad, the happy and the sad things. If you have something on your mind tell me. As a friend I am here to listen. Give our friendship a chance. The only way for it to grow and get stronger is for us to trust each other enough. Now give me a chance Heath.”
Once again Heath just looks at Nick then back at the ground “I don’t know” he replies “It’s just when I heard about all of you I was telling Aunt Rachel and Hannah that I didn’t know why he didn’t want to see me or any of you wanted anything to do with me. I wonder why Mama never told me. I wonder why I had to live the way we did.”
<p>
Lifting Heath’s chin slightly, “We didn’t know about you,” Nick tells him, “At all.”
“I know that now” Heath mentions “And when I came here but I didn’t know at the time I left Strawberry. I thought that none of you wanted anything to do with me because I was just a bastard brother that you didn’t want anything to do with the likes of me.” Nick says, “Heath, what did I tell you?”
Swallowing hard, “Stop saying bastard,” Heath relays.
“Then,” Nick asks, “Why are you still saying it?”
“Don’t know” Heath answers quietly “It’s something I’ve been all my life. You get use to it when it’s been said enough times. It’s a word I heard ever since I remember. People would say it and I hear it and knew they were saying it to me.”
Releasing Heath’s chin and turning his right hand into a fist “Well” Nick tells him “All those people who used that word or said that to you should’ve had their mouths washed out with soap or something. If I was there and heard any of them saying that to you I would’ve taken my fist here and put it right through their faces” and watches as a half smile appears on his face “And as much as I didn’t tell you this before and was giving you a hard time at first I do want you to know that I am glad you left Strawberry and came here when you did.”
Heath asks “You are?” perplexed.
“Yes,” Nick admits, “Because if you hadn’t then I wouldn’t have gotten to know you. And now that I know you, I think I am gonna like having you around.”
“This is so new to me,” Heath states, “I don’t know what to say, Nick.”
“You don’t have to say anything. Just listen,” Nick tells him, “Now the more questions I ask you will only help me to learn about you, okay?”
“Okay,” Heath replies.
“But anytime,” Nick says, “You want to ask me something I am always here and you could ask me any time of the day or night.” Heath replies “Can’t do that.”
“Yes” Nick says “I know you can’t. At least in the eyes of you that is and for now I won’t press it. But in time I do hope you could and will. And I believe the more you are with us the more you are around all of us and get to know us you will find that you could. And” pausing, “You could anytime you want. We will all be there to hear you and listen to you, whether we are all together or whether it’s just any one of us. Don’t be afraid; none of us is going to hurt you. We are your family and we are your friends. We are there for you anytime and all the time. In time you’ll get to know what it is to be a part of our family and I think as time goes on you will feel more comfortable around us and you’ll be able to do all that without any problem. Just let it come by you naturally and it will, okay?”
“Okay Nick,” Heath replies.
“How about we go to your sleeping in the barn?” Nick asks, “Why do you do it?”
“Not use to being in a room,” Heath answers, “Like that.”
“Did you sleep out in the barn,” Nick queries, “Either in Strawberry or at other ranches you worked at?” Heath answers, “Some I did.”
“Was that you’re choosing” Nick asks “Or was that the employers you worked for?” Heath replies, “Some mine, some theirs.”
“At the Wheelers, “Nick inquires, “Did you sleep out in their barn?”
“I did” Heath quickly looking at Nick answers.
“That first night you slept in the bunkhouse,” Nick says, “I remember you just lying there when I told you to get dressed. You had the same look last night when I came into your room to check on you. Were you planning on going out to the barn that night to sleep?” Heath replies, “Yes.”
“Were you waiting to be sure everyone were asleep,” Nick wanted to know, “Before you did that? To make sure they didn’t see you go out there?”
“Yes Nick,” Heath answers.
“Didn’t you sleep in a bed in Strawberry,” Nick asks, “With your mother or uncle?” Heath answers, “Mama I did.”
“But not with your uncle,” Nick asks to which Heath answers, “NO!”
“So,” Nick inquires, “You never slept in a bed by yourself?”
“In hotel,” Heath replies, “Coming to Stockton I did that first night.”
“And,” Nick asks, “How was that?” Heath replies “Didn’t sleep.”
Nick asks, “Why not?” Heath shrugs, “Couldn’t.”
Nick asks, “Did someone tell you that you couldn’t?”
“No,” Heath replies, “Just couldn’t.”
Nick still grilling him in why he can’t sleep in the bed at the hotel Heath finally answers, “I don’t know Nick. I lie there looking around seeing the door closed the windows and just something about that.”
“You mean,” Nick asks, “Being alone and the door closed bothers you?”
“Yeah,” Heath confides, “I don’t like being closed in.”
“What is it that bothers you about the door being closed?” Nick wanted to know.
Answering “Don’t know” Heath glances over at the various vegetation they pass by. Nick asks, “Have you always been bothered by that?”
Nodding his head, “As far back,” Heath responds, “As I could remember.”
“Were you ever in places like that?” Nick wanted to know with Heath asking, “What?”
Nick reiterates “Were you ever in places or rooms that had no windows or doors?” Watching as Heath nods his head, “Like being in the springhouse?”
As Heath looks at Nick then turns away “It’s okay Heath” Nick tells him “I won’t ever do that to you again. I’m sorry I did that to you in the first place, but it won’t happen again.”
After a couple seconds of quiet, “You were okay,” Nick inquires, “When your mama was with you right?” Heath replies, “Yeah.”
Nick says, “But not when you were alone?” Heath responds, “NO.”
“How about,” Nick suggests, “If we see what we could do with getting you to sleep up in your room, okay?” Heath replies, “Okay Nick.”
“But if for some reason” Nick says “You do find yourself going out to the barn will you do me a favor?” Heath asks, “What’s that Nick?”
“Make sure” Nick tells him “You have something warm on your feet; like socks or something. That ground must’ve been cold as you were walking out there, now wasn’t it?” Heath answers “Didn’t think about that.”
“I suppose” Nick says “I didn’t tell you to put socks on to go outside but then again when I left you I had you under the covers. I didn’t know you planned on going out there. If I knew that then I would’ve told you to make sure you had them on.”
Driving along for another couple minutes in silence and upon taking in the scenery Nick casually asks Heath how he likes the drive thus far to which Heath responds, “I like it; very nice.”
After a couple more seconds of mere quiet Nick thinking of how he wants to bring up the next question then coming out with the solution in his head says, “Heath. Mother, Jarrod, Duke and I were talking earlier and Duke mentioned a couple things to us. He said something about your uncle slapping your mother and taking you. What happened? Would you tell me?”
“I don’t know when,” Heath replies, “But he did do that yes.” Nick asks, “Why?”
“He didn’t want us leaving Strawberry,” Heath explains, “Mama did; she wanted us to get away from there.” Nick asks, “So, what did he do?”
“He came after us,” Heath says, “Mama tried fighting him off and told him to leave us alone. I tried helping her, I tried fighting him too but my uncle didn’t like it, he hit me and I was sort of pushed to the ground. I fell and then he slapped Mama, he had Mr. Wells and Mr. Moore take hold of me, they picked me up and took me back to Strawberry with them.”
“Who are Mr. Wells and Mr. Moore?” Nick wanted to know.
“Friends to my uncle,” Heath mentions.
“So,” Nick asks, “They took you back to Strawberry with them?” Heath replies, “They did.” Nick asks, “What about your mama?”
“They left her,” Heath answers, “Crying there.”
“She went back to Strawberry?” Nick queries.
“Yes” Heath says “She wanted to go but didn’t want to with me not with her.”
“Duke,” Nick brings up, “Also mentioned about when he asked you about me that you saw me as others. Have others you met or worked with do a lot of yelling or talking harshly or badly to you?” Nodding his head, “Yes, “Heath answers softly.
“Sorry about that Heath” Nick replies “I hope you don’t see me being like them.” Heath says “Not now, no.” Nick asks “But up until last night you did, right?”
Heath not answering just turns away and looks at the scenery they pass by “I” Nick notes “Guess that tells me your answer. It’s alright; I want to know these things. I need to know what I can about you so every little bit helps that includes the bad and the good. That’s the only way I could learn too from what I say and do,” driving along again for a couple more minutes in silence “Heath” Nick then says “From that very first day you came to live here with all of us you kept watching me. Were you wondering when I would start hitting you? Did you think that I or the rest of the family would at any time hit or whip you? Was that running around your head all that time?”
As Heath swallows hard and is just looking at him, “It never occurred to me that is what was going through your head. I just thought that it was your being new here. I do understand now,” Nick then asks of him, “You do know that I would never do anything like that to you right?”
Swallowing hard again, “Starting to,” Heath admits, “Wasn’t sure though, but did wonder.” Nick asks, “Wonder what Heath?” Heath answers, “When you would.”
“You mean put you in your place” Nick wanted to know “Know where you belong?” watching as Heath nods his head “Well, it’s not gonna happen. Not now, not ever. I don’t do that kind of thing. You need to get that through your head and get it in enough so that you believe it” glancing down at him while he continues driving “And I mean it Heath” raising his voice slightly “Never! And neither would the rest of the family, you got that?” Heath replies “Got it Nick.”
“I hope so,” Nick then says, “Another thing Duke brought up was something about when you were in your uncle’s home or hotel you weren’t allowed to talk unless you were asked something.” Heath replies, “Yes.”
“Your uncle,” Nick asks, “Didn’t like you talking at all?”
“No,” Heath answers, “I had to remain silent and he made sure I did just that.”
“Did he punish you for talking?” Nick wanted to know. Heath answers, “Some.”
“From hearing about him,” Nick says, “Your uncle was pretty bad to you but could I ask why? I mean why he was so bad to you?”
Shrugging his shoulders, “Not know,” Heath answers softly and as he glances down at his legs mentions, “I just know that he hated me.”
“Hated you?” Nick asks, “Why Heath?”
“Don’t really know,” Heath replies, “I guess he blames me for my mama. For not being able to find someone and get married and live a much better life than what she was living. He did what he could to keep me away from her.”
“How did he do that?” Nick wanted to know.
“He’d keep me at the hotel,” Heath answers, “When a job came he had me work.”
“I understand you worked in the mines,” Nick brings up.
“I did work in the mines,” Heath answers strongly, “Was charge boy.”
Doing a double take “A charge boy?” Nick inquires “You threw charges into the mines?” Heath answers, “I did.”
“Why did you do that kind of work?” Nick asks.
“Had to,” Heath replies, “Was one of the few who could fit in there,” looking straight at Nick, “To do it.”
As Nick asks him how old he was Heath shrugs his shoulders and responds, “Six.”
“Six?” Nick being taken back asks “You were six years old working in there?”
Heath states, “I was.”
Still in a state of shock, “Are you for real?” Nick asks, “Are you serious? You were actually working in the mines when you were six?” Heath answers, “I am.”
Studying Heath’s face for a moment, “You really are,” Nick notes.
Looking directly at Nick, “Yes,” Heath responds.
“Did your mama,” Nick wanted to know, “Like you doing that kind of work?”
“No,” Heath answers, “She wanted me to stop but uncle didn’t. So I had to.”
“Didn’t you attend school?” Nick inquires. Heath mentions, “Went to school.”
“Then,” Nick ponders, “How is it you worked in the mines? When school was done for the day?”
“No,” Heath explains, “No more school. Had me go to mine, had to work, had to stay there.”
“Why would your uncle want you working in a mine?” Nick asks, “Instead of going to school?”
Shrugging shoulders “Not know” Heath answers “Just had to. Money, I guess. Not like me so didn’t much matter to me. My kind didn’t need school. No use
come of it.” Nick mimics, “No use come of it?” Heath states, “NO!”
“Throwing charges into a mine,” Nick surmises, “You could’ve gotten yourself killed. Didn’t your uncle even think of that?”
“Not think so,” Heath mentions, “Probably wanted that.”
Nick asks, “He wanted you dead?” Heath states, “He did.”
“Tell me something,” Nick asks, “What came first, the school or the working in the mine?” Heath answers, “School.”
“So,” Nick says, “Working in the mine came after that?” Heath replies, “It did.”
“You said,” Nick brings up, “Your mama tried leaving Strawberry with you.”
“She did,” Heath reiterates, “But didn’t get to.”
“Which came first,” Nick inquires, “Working in the mine or her leaving Strawberry with you?” Heath answers, “Working in mine.”
“Were you still working in the mines when she left Strawberry or did that happen when you no longer worked there?” Nick wanted to know.
Heath replies, “Still working.”
“How long did you work in the mines?” Nick inquires.
Shrugging shoulders, “Not know. Awhile” Heath answers.
“So, you went to school, but stopped when you started going to work in the mines, and while you were working in them, your mama left Strawberry with you, but you and her didn’t get far, and your uncle came after you, and then you went back to working in the mines.” Nick says.
Nodding his head while looking up at Nick Heath replies, “Uh-huh.”
<p>
Exhaling heavily but getting away from that topic at the moment Nick decides to ask him questions regarding his work on the various ranches he went to and upon asking him if he got them on his own or if his uncle set them up for him Heath responds “Some uncle set up. I had to do it. They made sure I did.”
“How’s that?” Nick asks, “They didn’t let you go if you wanted to?”
Shaking his head “NO!” Heath answers.
“Did your Uncle have something to do with your working with the Wheelers?” Nick wanted to know to which Heath nods and answers, “He did.”
“And when you worked for them,” Nick asks, “They didn’t allow you to leave?”
“No,” Heath replies again.
“How long did you work for them?” Nick inquires to which Heath shrugs his shoulders and answers, “Don’t know; awhile.”
“The ranches you worked at,” Nick wanted to know, “Did you work at them after you worked in the mines?” Heath replies, “I did.”
“Did you ever work in the hotel for your uncle?” Nick asks of Heath to which he replies again, “I did.”
As Nick asks what kind of work he had him do Heath explains “Anything given. Scrubbing floors, clean dishes, table, peel potatoes.”
Nick then curiously asks, “Did he pay you for doing that?” Heath replies, “No.”
“You know” Nick brings up “When we went out that first day and I was showing you around I remember asking you about your working away from Strawberry and you said you had to.” Heath answers, “I did have to.”
“Was being confined,” Nick inquires, “Part of their holding you?”
Heath not answering looks first at Nick and then at the ground “It’s alright Heath” Nick says “You don’t have to say anything. I’m getting my answers. I just need to know and I’m beginning to understand the-had to part now. When you first said it I didn’t but now I do. I just wanted to let you know that and even though I did give you a hard time at the beginning doesn’t mean I wasn’t listening to you. I did hear everything you were saying, I just wasn’t ready to accept you as of yet. But now I am, I just wanted to make sure you knew that and that you heard it from me,” Heath once again shows a partial grin.
<p>
Riding for a couple more seconds of quiet and enjoying the scenery they are passing by Nick then asks “Heath, your uncle really hated you that much?”
“He did,” Heath answers, “He thought by keeping me away that Mama could find someone but Mama wouldn’t. Sometimes I wish I weren’t born, like Uncle wanted. Maybe if someone did away with me earlier on things for my mama would’ve been better. Since I was born Mama had to live with people calling us names, no one wanted anything to do with us except Aunt Rachel and Hannah. A couple asked her to send me away but she wouldn’t. She would say I was the most important person in her life that I came first no matter what. I always felt bad for her and thinking if I weren’t there then maybe she could’ve done better.”
Nick bringing the wagon to a complete stop and without warning Heath not knowing what to make of it tenses up and quickly jumps down off the wagon. Quickly jumping down, Nick chases after him. As Nick calls out to him “Hey Heath, wait!” he continues running.
<p>
Nick racing after him Heath continues making tracks and as he tries catching up to him Heath keeps on running without stopping; Nick picking up speed and thinking fast leaps up and onto him resulting in them both dropping to the ground.
<p>
While Nick quickly tackles him to the ground Heath struggles to break free and upon rolling onto his back Nick places a firm grip on his shoulders telling him “Settle down Heath” who is breathing heavily, trembling and letting out little whimpers “Settle down! I didn’t mean to startle you! Stop!”
Watching as he continues trying to wiggle free “I am not gonna hurt you. I’m sorry. Take it easy” as he keeps his grip on him says “Heath, listen to me. It’s alright, its okay. Take it easy. I’m not gonna hurt you. Everything is fine. I assure you. You have to stop being so jumpy. I just want to talk. Trust me will you?” waiting patiently as he slowly begins to calm down “That’s it Heath, just relax.”
As he shifts his position slightly and takes hold of his arm with one hand and his chin in the other while keeping his strong hold on him looks straight into his eyes and as Heath looks at him “Heath” keeping a fix on them “You should never think less of yourself” Nick tells him “Everyone on this earth has a reason for being here. Your mother thought a lot of you and you were the most important person in her life. Mothers think a lot of their children. They are the most important things in their lives.”
“But” Heath mentions “All it did was cause her trouble” continuing to look up at Nick who replies “But it wasn’t your fault. It’s just something that happened.”
“Maybe,” Heath says as Nick continues to lock eye contact with him, “But if she didn’t have me her life wouldn’t have been like that.”
“Heath,” Nick tells him, “You don’t know that. No one could know how another one’s life is gonna turn out. You’re just as important here as anybody else is. Whatever the circumstances are or were that should not make a difference. IF she didn’t have you maybe her life could’ve been worse than what she had.”
“If you weren’t born” he adds “Then you wouldn’t have grown up to be who you are now. And I wouldn’t have had an opportunity to have met you. I still don’t know you at all but I wouldn’t have known you at all if you didn’t come here. I wouldn’t have known you existed. Everyone here has a reason or a purpose for living.” Heath asks, “What is my purpose or reason for living, except to cause someone trouble?”
“You’re being here is purpose enough,” Nick states, “No one can know for sure what their purpose here is. One day you may find out then again you may not,” letting out a little chuckle, “Maybe your purpose here is to keep me in line.”
Heath asks, “How’s that?”
“You helped me to see how bad I was” Nick confides “I didn’t really realize it until last night. You were comparing me to others that you had to work for. Now, I could very well have been like that, I would never have realized it. You’re being here helped that. You have more courage than you could possibly know, Heath. Right now, you think that you could only talk when someone asks you something but you’re not afraid to say things. You tell it straight out. I have a feeling that once you start to loosen up and come to realize that you could talk all you want and when you want there will be no stopping you; there will be no shutting you up. And you want to know something?” Heath asks, “What?”
“I hope you do,” Nick tells him, “I want to hear you talking. I want to hear what you have to say. If you should see or hear me doing something that you don’t think is right or could be said or done differently I want to hear that too. You could always come to me and tell me that. You’re also filling a void that I had.”
“A void…” Heath cutting him off asks.
“Yes” Nick replies “An emptiness; something that has been missing when Father died. It hasn’t been the same running the ranch by myself. As much as you are new here I am just as new at running the ranch. I mean I learned all there is to know about working it but the actually running it and knowing how much I need something like putting up a fence let’s say for instance, that is the first fence I had put in since I have been given control of all of that. Perhaps as time goes on when you’ve been here awhile and things get easier and you know all there is to know and you feel more comfortable there and we feel more comfortable with each other then perhaps maybe you may like to help me run it. You already did a great job with designing and putting up the bridge and now the fence. Some of what you did to them we never thought of or would’ve thought of. But you did it completely on your own. So who knows what other ideas you have inside your head? You just might have more that could very well help the ranch out in a good way. Maybe we could run it side by side. And you want to know something?”
As Nick is releasing his hold on him Heath sitting up asks, “What?”
“Here and now,” Nick tells him, “It has a nice sound to it. What do you think?”
“Don’t know,” Heath answers. Nick asks, “Would you or do you think you would be interested?”
“Not sure,” Heath replies, “Never thought that far ahead. All I thought about was coming here, nothing more.”
Noticing him trembling, “Heath,” Nick touching him asks, “Why does this bother you so much, me touching you like this? You’re trembling terribly?”
“Don’t know,” Heath replies. Holding his arms out, “Come here,” Nick says.
“What?” Heath asks with Nick saying, “Just come here,” and at first resisting and trying to pull back Nick quickly grabs hold of his arms and pulls him into his and still feeling him trembling as he draws him to his chest, “Shh, it’s okay! It’s okay now, I am here Heath. Hush! Shh! It’s alright.”
As Heath’s arms are dangling by his side and he’s looking towards the ground unemotional “See Heath?” Nick tells him “Its okay, it’s okay!” comforting and rocking him in his arms slightly then asks “Heath, when was the last time someone did this for you?”
“Mama did,” Heath mentions, “Aunt Rachel did; Hannah did. Don’t remember when though.” Nick asks, “Was it recently or longer than that?”
Shrugging his shoulders, “Longer,” Heath mumbles, “Don’t know.”
“I am full of surprises,” Nick mentions, “You are probably thinking inside your head, right?” Heath nods his head but doesn’t say anything.
“It’s okay,” Nick tells him, “You’re gonna have to get use to me and others doing things like this with you. This is some of what it is to be part of a family, our family or being a friend who cares. And I just thought you could use one of these right now,” holding him close to him, Nick says, “Uh Heath,” still comforting him.
“Yeah,” Heath replies.
Nick tells him “You definitely have to start eating more I could feel the bones in your back” as he moves Heath out of his arms and looking into his eyes once again “I mean it Heath” he says “You have to start eating more” gripping the sides of Heath’s face in his hands and running the thumbs along side each jaw.
As he starts looking away “You hear me?” Nick asks of him who responds “I hear Nick.”
“Well okay,” Nick says sternly, “Uh Heath?”
Replying “Yeah” Heath looks back up at Nick.
“I also meant what I said,” Nick says, “I don’t want you to ever start thinking less of yourself or thinking you have no purpose here. You got that?”
Slowly nodding his head, “I’ll try,” he states.
Replying, “Good boy,” Nick lightly pats his cheeks with his hands.
Heath then says, “Nick.” Nick asks, “Yes Heath?”
“Mama use to tell me some of that,” Heath confides.
“You mean about your thinking less of yourself?” Nick wanted to know.
Nodding his head, “Yeah,” Heath answers, “She said something like that. She said I was her golden little angel, her special gift from god. And she said something like your mother said to be proud of who I am.”
“Well” Nick says “You need to listen to what she told you because she’s right. Mothers are usually right anyway, that’s their job. But just remember what they told you, my mother as well as yours to be proud of whom you are. Don’t ever change because of someone else. Be who you are! Too bad your mother wasn’t here now I would love to have met her. She sounds like one heck of a woman.”
Showing a smile but then looking away “She was” Heath answers softly but proudly.
“You know Heath” Nick mentions “That is the first real smile I’ve seen on your face since you’ve been here. It’s nice to see and your mother must’ve been to have a grown up son like that. And as I told you last night as I am telling you again now that I will always be there for you. Just remember that, okay? You are no longer alone anymore. You have me right there beside you, okay?” holding his chin in his hand. Heath replies, “Okay.”
Nick then says “And Heath” to who answers “Yes Nick?”
“I mean what I said,” Nick says, “About your running the ranch with me. You don’t have to give me your answer right now. It just sort of came out of my mouth without me thinking but as I said it does have a nice ring to it. We’ll take it all slow as I also mentioned before. Once you get familiar with everything and you’re more comfortable being around me, the men, the ranch, we’ll bring it up again, okay? I won’t rush you. We’ll take everything one day at a time. And who knows, it just might come naturally to you without warning.”
“Okay Nick” Heath answers “We’ll see what happens.”
Asking him one more question Nick says, “I know you didn’t have much schooling but do you know how to read and write?” Heath answers, “I know how to read and write.”
“Well okay,” Nick states, “I just wanted to know. How about we get back in the wagon and resume heading for town?”
“Okay,” Heath answers.
Holding his hand out, “Here,” Nick says, “Let me help you up,” and with that Heath taking hold of the extended hand Nick helps him get back on his feet.
<p>
Getting back in the wagon Nick takes back the reins and starts driving again.
<p>
A few minutes later arriving in town of Stockton “Well” Nick announces “Here we are. Let’s take this wagon over to the lumber mill and see if the shipment came in. If it did and while they are loading it we will see about finding Jarrod and having a drink together. How’s that sound to you?”
“Sounds fine to me Nick” Heath replies with Nick mimicking “Well, sounds fine to me too. Let’s go.”
<p>
As Nick and Heath head down to the lumber mill Victoria takes a trip out to the gravesite. Kneeling before the headstone, closing her eyes “Oh Tom” she says “The breakthrough we have been waiting for has finally happened. Nick has finally accepted Heath.”
Letting out a little grin “You have no idea on how happy that makes me feel” she continues “Maybe now that boy will feel a part of this family. I know it’s what you would’ve wanted and in a rare sense of the word he is the last gift of yours that you could ever bring to the family. I think he will be good for Nick. I think he is the balance to keeping him on his toes.”
“But whatever ever happens” she mentions “I just want Heath to share in it, to be a part of it with the entire family; his working side by side with Nick. We still have much to learn about him but it’s a beginning. That young man has truly had a very hard and rough life. It’s so sad how he had to grow up like that but it won’t get any harder or rougher. We will all do what we have to, to help him. Even Duke, will be helping. He is sort of the surrogate father figure for him that he could use. I’m sure you would like that. He also has Jarrod and Nick.”
“He is now opening up” she says “Nick got it moving and somehow I knew he would be the key to getting him to do so. Oh Tom, I sure wish you were here to see him. You would be very pleased. He is a very nice young man. You would be proud to be his father and very proud to have him as your son.”
“You know this is the first trip” she adds “I’ve made out here since it happened. I didn’t or couldn’t face coming up here before. But now I guess I am ready to do so. Maybe that’s another good thing that has come from Heath’s coming to us; getting all of us out of our slumps. Each one of us hasn’t been able to go on as quickly as we had liked to, but now I think we are truly ready. At least I am. I just hope each of the children are as well.”
“Well Tom” she says “I just came up here to tell you about Heath, I will make another visit here real soon. It won’t take another six months to do that anymore. I love you” giving the grave a quick kiss “And always will. You are in my heart night and day” she then gets up, mounts her horse and heads back to the ranch.
<p>
Bringing the wagon to a complete stop outside Bob’s Mill, Nick climbing out of it has Heath coming with him inside the store. Upon entering Nick placing his hand on the back of Heath’s shoulders says, “Hi Bob, I like for you to meet someone. This is Heath.”
Holding out his hand Bob replies “hello,” who reciprocates with saying “Hi sir.”
Bob asks “He’s new around here?” Nick replies “Yes, he is.”
As he is asked if he works for him Nick answers “In a way. He’s not any ordinary worker” placing his hand on Heath’s back he says proudly “He is my brother.”
“Your brother” Bob mystified asks, “How’s that?”
“Just is” Nick says “We just learned about him and he just came to live with us.”
“I think I remember seeing him at the services we had for Frank and Harry. But I just thought he was one of the visiting friends to them” Bob notes.
“Well,” Nick replies, “He’s not.”
As Bob asks Heath where he’s from Heath tells him, “Strawberry.”
“Hey,” Bob retorts, “No kidding. I remember your father owning a mine there way back when Nick.”
Answering, “We know,” Nick then changes the subject quickly and asks if the new shipment came in yet to which Bob informs him it has. Nick tells him he will take what he has available and come back later for what they need.
Bob says, “That sounds fair. I could give you 200 slats.”
Replying, “That’ll be fine,” Nick asks him to have them loaded up in the wagon and informs him he’ll be back for them in a little bit.
“Oh sure,” Bob tells him, “No problem.”
Nick then says, “Come on Heath,” and with that they walk out of the mill together with one of the men nearby listening to the conversation between Bob and Nick comes over and says, “So, a new brother.”
“Hey,” Bob tells him, “Mind your own business Paul. How he came to them is their business not ours. I pay you to work, now get to work.”
Replying, “Yes sir,” the man returns to what he was doing.
<p>
Traveling down the street side by side Nick says to Heath, “Let’s go see where Jarrod is hiding.”
<p>
Walking idly looking about hoping to see Jarrod Nick asks Heath if he sees him anywhere to which he responds “No I don’t” as he looks to each side of the street, to each building or person they pass by.
Nick then says, “Let’s go to his office, if he’s not there we will wait for him.”
Replying “Yeah okay” Heath and Nick while heading for Jarrod’s office Nick inquires “Do you remember where it is?” with Heath answering “I remember.”
Nick then asks, “Heath, which hotel did you stay at the night you came here?”
Replying, “I’ll show you,” Heath points to the one on the right, “That one,” he mentions. Nick asks, “Is that the one you brought Audra to?”
“When she came to town,” Heath states, “I saw her trying to fight off some of the men that grabbed for her and took hold of her fast and ran up the stairs and fixed her arm up that got hurt.”
“I like to thank you for that,” Nick says, “Audra can be a little on the wild side,” chuckling, “At times she has a little of me in her.”
“I could see that,” Heath notes, “She told me she likes to do what she wants.”
“She does,” Nick admits, “We do all have a tendency of spoiling her because she is the only girl, our only sister. But we also have to watch her too so that no harm does come to her. Sometimes, I think she lives in a dream world, expecting things to be differently than what they truly are.” Heath says, “I could understand that.”
“Hopefully” Nick sighs “She’ll grow up to realize that it’s not that tame out there; that things can get a little hairy out there at times” arriving at Jarrod’s Law Office “Well,” glancing at the door “Here we are Heath” Nick says “Let’s go in.” Opening the door he is met and greeted by Miss Haas’ Jarrod’s secretary.
Upon removing his hat Nick asks of her, “Has my brother Jarrod come by yet?”
“No,” she replies, “Not yet.”
Nick informs her “We’ll wait for him in his office when he comes tell him we’re in here.” Replying “Sure Nick” Miss Haas glancing over at Heath asks “Um, who is this with you?”
As Nick introduces him to Miss Haas, Heath removes his hat nods and replies “Howdy Ma’am.”
Returning the greeting Miss Haas says, “I remember you from the other day when Jarrod brought you in with him.” Heath replies, “Yes Ma’am.”
Nick says “This here is my brother.” Doing a double take “Your brother?” she mimics.
“Yes,” Nick replies, “Come on,” he then says to Heath who follows him into Jarrod’s private office.
<p>
Jarrod, coming out of the Pinkerton’s Agency walks up the street and after making a quick trip to the telegraph office and finding there aren’t any wires for them crosses the street.
TBC
